The tiny tent I once lived in for two weeks in Italy.

First, a confession. I used to be a hoarder. I collected books, statues of elephants, old documents and all kinds of other stuff that I thought I might enjoy having around the house. When I travelled I always carried the maximum amount allowed by they airline and frequently had to pay overweight fees on my baggage when returning home from holidays abroad. I always had too many clothes and a lot of other unneccessary stuff. Like most people I continued to move to bigger flats and then finally a house where I could continue to collect and store things.

Then about 5 years ago I got divorced. I could no longer afford to live in a house and had to rent a series of apartments. Moving is no fun when you have to carry all this stuff! I started travelling alone and suddenly I had to carry all my luggage by myself and discovered that I couldn´t do it anymore. I felt more and more like material things were holding me back and being a burden on my life. I decided to make some changes.

First I started reading everything I could find about light travel. I´m by no means a master of the art of travelling light, but now I normally carry no more than 10kg of luggage and that includes a maximum of 10 pieces of clothing (not counting socks and underwear). Travelling is much easier this way, both when I travel for meetings and for fun. Now my holidays are about experiences and connections with people, not about carrying or worrying about my material posessions.

I found myself thinking more and more about reducing my posessions and searched for inspiration. I read the book “Walden” by Henry David Thoreau which made a profound impression on me. I have since reread it several times. I discovered that there is a whole movement of people searching for a more simple and meaningful life through minimalism. Two websites on the subject that I like very much are www.theminimalists.com and www.missminimalist.com. It is an ongoing process but I´m slowly getting rid of more and more things. Every time I take a bag or a box to the trash or to donate to charity I feel like a little weight has been lifted.

For the time being I have settled in a small house that I bought with my mum and living in such a small space is really a good motivation for clutter reduction. In the beginning I was all about organizing more so I could fit more in less space, but now I realize that this was just a way of putting the clutter away, not reducing it. Our house is about 100 square meters (1100 square feet) in size, and my private room is about 20 m2 (215 sf). My 17 year old son lives here too and we share a kitchen, living room, dining room and bathroom. We even had my sister living in the living room for a few months this year after she broke up with her boyfriend. We usually get along well and don´t feel bad about having such a small space. Another inspiration for simple living is the documentary “We the Tiny House People” that I love.

The Documentary “We the Tiny House People”

In a few short weeks I´m turning 40. In some ways the thought is frightening, I know that many people fear death at this age, but what I think people are mostly afraid of is growing old. Our culture is obsessed with youth and especially women are bombarded with advertisements on everything from wrinkle creams and hair dye to cosmetic surgery, all telling us that turning older is bad and even worse is looking your age.

In my thirties I have often been told that I look younger than my actual age. I used to always feel flattered and thank people profusely for their kind comments on my looks. The only time it was a disadvantage was at work when pet owners were sceptical hearing me talk about my experiences in treating animals with a certain illness, since many assumed that I was only a recently graduated veterinarian because I looked young.

In the last couple of years I have noticed that I finally have started to look more my age. Some fine wrinkles have turned up around the eyes and in the beginning I was worried about getting older. In the past I always just used a 10$ face sun cream (I don´t care to spend a lot of money on cosmetics and have always been very sceptical about expensive skin creams that are supposed to make you look and feel younger, but really mostly serve to make your wallet lighter) as a face cream and it seemed to be fine but when I started noticing wrinkles at first I thouht to myself “oh, my god, I have ruined my skin with these cheap products!” I bought some expensive face creams and even one of those “wrinkle iron” contraptions in anticipation of using it every other day in an attempt to make them go away. I tried it and it really seems to work but to my own surprise I was not motivated to use it regularly. To my surprise I don´t dislike the little lines as much as I thought I would.

Now I am starting to feel that it is a good thing to look my age. I want people to see my experiences and know that I am a mature and capable person. Unlike some of my girlfriends I never want to go back to being 25. I like 39 much better, I feel more confident now and happier too. I don’t worry as much about the little things as I did before and I am starting to live my life the way I want and not the way that everyone else expects of me. Now I like my body, wrinkles, extra weight and all. I have discovered that I don´t need to be very skinny and covered in makeup for men to like me. And I don´t need everyone to like me either.

In all the languages I know so far, my native icelandic, danish and english (a little bit of german too) I get asked how old I am. Why, I am not old at all, well at least I don´t feel old. Even the children are assumed to be old by this manner of asking.

One of the things that I have been doing for myself in the past few years is to learn italan. As I learn I admire the beauty of the language, both the way it sounds and how it is used. In italian you don´t ask a person how old they are, but how many years they have: “quanti anni hai?” This seems much more logical and respectful. I have 39 years under my belt and each and every one of them has given me invaluable experiences. Therefore we should all be proud of the years we have and not try to hide or lie about our age. Don´t get my wrong, I´m not talking about not taking care of my skin or my appearance anymore, just worrying less and enjoying more. Don´t be afraid to put your real age out there, on your facebook profile and on that online dating site too!